How to Find Motivation When Everything Is Falling Apart Around You
Admitting that things are out of place is not a sign of weakness – it’s pure courage.
São Leopoldo, January 9, 2025 - Year II - Edition 053
Good morning! After 6:04 AM, you receive Edition 053 of the Fer’s Newsletter. This edition continues our Edition 050, published on December 26, 2024, in which we discussed the five pillars of emotional intelligence. If you haven't read it yet, I highly recommend that you click here first, before moving on to the rest of this reading.
Today, I chose to discuss the pillar of motivation. The title of this edition reflects my search, and perhaps yours as well: How do you find motivation when everything around you seems to be falling apart and nothing seems to be working? If I am honest, I write a lot for myself. However, I truly believe that my words can touch and help others, just as they help me.
So, read without fear or hurry. Allow yourself to reflect, absorb, and, most of all, feel the transformation that these words can bring. We are together on this journey of evolution!
How to Find Motivation When Everything Is Falling Apart Around You
Admitting that things are out of place is not a sign of weakness – it’s pure courage.
When everything seems to be falling apart, finding motivation may feel out of reach. But know that even on the darkest days, there is a spark of light within you. These moments of chaos test our core, revealing strengths we didn’t even know we had. It’s like a fire that destroys to make room for a new beginning. Your ability to rise in the face of pain is what shapes true courage. Remember: today’s rubble can be tomorrow’s foundation.
Motivation is not magic; it’s built daily. Even amidst chaos, small actions can reignite your purpose and bring meaning to your journey. Start with the simple, find a reason for every step. Your story of overcoming may be exactly the inspiration the world needs. Look beyond the challenges, like someone watching a storm with the certainty that the sun will rise. You have within you the strength to rebuild everything and much more.
Understanding Motivation
Motivation is like that spark that ignites a fire on a cold night. It’s the drive that gets us moving, the invisible engine that makes us get out of bed, even when the world seems to be falling apart around us. It can come from dreams that warm our hearts or from the urgent need to leave an uncomfortable place. Either way, motivation is what transforms intention into action.
But what happens when that spark seems to have faded? When the fuel that once drove us seems to have evaporated? It is in those moments that we need to understand where motivation truly comes from. It’s not just about energy or enthusiasm, but about purpose. Think of it like a river: sometimes it flows strong and vigorously; other times, it’s just a trickle. But even in droughts, there is a path waiting to be replenished.
Motivation can be divided into two main sources: intrinsic and extrinsic. The first comes from within you, that burning desire to do something because it fulfills you, connecting you to who you truly are. The second comes from the outside: deadlines, rewards, or even external pressure.
Knowing how it works is like learning to row in a drifting boat. It doesn’t matter if the current is against you or if there seems to be no wind: the movement, even if small, is in your hands. Believe me, motivation doesn’t disappear—it just changes form, waiting to be rediscovered.
The Role of Emotions in Motivation
Our emotions are the compass of our journey. When we are filled with joy, it feels as if the world is conspiring in our favor, and everything flows naturally. But when sadness or fear takes control, life transforms into an unrelenting storm, where even the simplest steps seem impossible.
These feelings are not enemies; they are messengers. They show us where our wounds are, our doubts, and what truly matters. Ignoring emotions is like driving with an empty tank—we won’t get far. The secret is in listening to them, embracing them, and turning them into fuel.
Recognizing your feelings is like reigniting a flame. You realize that even in the darkest nights, there is light within you. And it is this light that guides your motivation. Don’t run from your emotions; use them as allies to rediscover your purpose.
Intrinsic vs. Extrinsic Motivation
Have you ever stopped to think about where that drive comes from that pushes you to keep moving forward? Two types of motivation guide our actions: intrinsic and extrinsic. Intrinsic motivation is like a fire burning within you, fueled by the pleasure of doing something simply because it makes sense to you and fulfills you. It's the sense of pride in overcoming a challenge or the peace of keeping a promise to yourself.
Extrinsic motivation, on the other hand, is like a breeze pushing your sails – external rewards like money, recognition, or approval from others. It’s important, of course, but in the darkest moments, when everything seems to fall apart, it's the intrinsic motivation that keeps you standing.
So, connect with what warms your soul. Discover the why behind what you do, and let that flame guide you, even amid the storm.
Identifying the Challenges Around Us
When everything seems to be falling apart, the first reaction is often to want to escape. Who hasn’t wished they could disappear for a moment and wake up when everything is resolved? But the truth is that to rebuild something, we must face the rubble. It’s painful, but it’s in this confrontation that we begin to regain control.
Take a moment to think: what is making you feel like the ground is collapsing beneath you? Losing your job? A strained relationship? The overwhelming feeling of loneliness? Recognizing chaos doesn’t mean surrendering to it, but taking the first step to transform it. After all, how can you fix something you can’t even name?
Admitting that things are out of place is not a sign of weakness – it’s pure courage. It’s like looking at a storm and, instead of hiding, deciding to face it head-on. And you know what’s amazing? During that turmoil, you discover strengths you never knew you had.
Identifying the challenges around us is like turning on a flashlight in a dark room. Suddenly, you begin to see the obstacles and, with that, you can start mapping out paths. Don’t try to carry the weight of the world alone. Share your struggles with someone you trust, write down your thoughts, and breathe deeply. You don’t need to have all the answers now, but recognizing the chaos is the first step toward finding the way out. And believe me, it exists.
The Importance of Acknowledging Pain
Pain is often an unwelcome visitor that knocks on our door, but ignoring it only makes it shout louder. According to Brené Brown, a researcher on courage and vulnerability, "what is not transformed is transmitted." In other words, by suppressing our pain, it manifests in other ways, impacting our lives even more deeply.
Admitting that we are suffering is not a sign of weakness, but an act of bravery. Facing what hurts is like opening a wound to clean it; it hurts, but it is necessary for healing. "Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional," wrote Haruki Murakami, reminding us that we have a choice in how we deal with our experiences.
Acknowledge your pain. Accept it as part of the growth process. Because only those who are honest with themselves can turn their rubble into the foundation for a new beginning.
Recognizing What Is Within Your Control
Amid the chaos, it’s easy to feel powerless, as if circumstances are deciding everything for you. But the truth is, even when the world around you is crumbling, you always have something in your hands: the power over your choices. Viktor Frankl, Holocaust survivor and author of Man's Search for Meaning teaches us that, even in the most desperate situations, "the last of the human freedoms is to choose one's attitude in any given set of circumstances."
This means that, even when we cannot control external events, we can control the way we respond to them. Focus on what is within your reach: your reactions, your next steps, and your attitude toward challenges. Do not underestimate the power of decision, because, in every small choice, you are creating a new path for your overcoming.
Strategies to Find Motivation in Chaos
When chaos seems to swallow us, it's easy to lose sight of our strength. But it's precisely in these turbulent moments that our true motivation can emerge. Motivation, like muscles, needs to be exercised to grow stronger, and the good news is that it’s within your reach, even in the eye of the storm. You are not alone on this journey, and it’s possible to find your way back to your center.
The first strategy is to start with small victories. Sometimes, the idea of taking a big leap is so daunting that it paralyzes us. So, why not focus on the next simplest step? Get out of bed, drink a glass of water, and tidy up the table. Each positive action will fuel the fire of motivation, propelling you toward the next step.
Another powerful tool is the power of gratitude. When everything around us seems to crumble, taking a moment to be thankful for what we still have is a reminder that, despite the pain, there is always something good in our lives. Gratitude lights up the darkness and reminds us of our potential to overcome.
Don’t be afraid to ask for help. Sometimes, motivation comes through the words of someone who believes in you when you can barely believe in yourself. Don’t underestimate the power of a friendly shoulder and a sincere conversation. Sometimes, the support of those around you can be the key to reigniting the spark of motivation.
Setting Small and Achievable Goals
Sometimes, looking at big goals can make your heart race—not out of excitement, but out of fear. The truth is, that the biggest dreams can seem unattainable when we're in the midst of a storm. So, how about starting in a gentler way with yourself? How about taking the first step, even if it's a tiny one?
Tidying up a single room, reading those 5 pages of a book you've been putting off, or having that coffee you've always wanted. Each small victory lights a spark of motivation within you as if you were building a castle of daily wins. And the best part: with each achievement, your confidence grows, and the next goal won’t seem so far away.
Don’t underestimate the power of small steps. They are the foundation of what's to come, and each one is a reminder that you are capable.
Cultivating a Positive Mindset
The key to transforming your reality lies in the way you perceive the world. When everything around you seems to be falling apart, the first thing you can change is your mind. Believe me: the power to change your story starts with how you think about yourself and the challenges you face. By adopting a growth mindset, you begin to see each difficulty as a disguised opportunity, a necessary step for your growth.
Imagine that every obstacle is a lesson, a chance to become stronger and wiser. Believe in your potential to learn and evolve with each new challenge. When you change your thinking, you begin to change your actions, and ultimately, your life. No matter how tough the moment is, remember: your strength lies in how you face what lies ahead. The power is within you!
Gratitude as a Tool for Change
Have you ever stopped to think about the small blessings in your day? Gratitude doesn’t erase problems, but it can transform how you see them.
When we embrace the good, even in the most difficult situations, our hearts grow stronger and find strengths we didn’t even know existed. Each moment of gratitude is a step toward healing and renewal, like a light that illuminates even the darkest corners of our souls.
Seeking Support Through Your Social Network
In the darkest moments, light can come from where you least expect it. Sometimes, all it takes is a conversation, a genuine exchange of words with someone who truly cares, for the weight of the world to begin to lighten.
Never underestimate the power of a virtual hug, a listening ear, or words of encouragement. Your friends, your family, and the people who love you can show you that you’re not alone, even when loneliness feels overwhelming. By opening your heart, you not only release suffering but also a renewing energy.
Through the support of others, you find a foundation to rise again. Amid the chaos, remember: you are worthy of being heard, of being embraced, and often, it is in that embrace that the motivation to move forward is reborn. Don’t be afraid to seek that support; it is essential for your recovery.
Drawing Inspiration from Stories of Overcoming
Amidst pain and chaos, we look to stories of overcoming as beacons that light the way. There is nothing more powerful than witnessing someone conquer what seemed impossible. These stories are like a cry of hope, reminding us that even in the darkest situations, there is a light waiting to shine. They show us that, no matter how difficult the moment, the storm will pass, and often, we emerge from it stronger than before.
Think of those stories of people who faced loss, illness, or nearly insurmountable challenges but, with courage and perseverance, turned their struggles into victories. They weren't made of steel but of an inner strength that we all possess. What sets these people apart is not the absence of pain, but the ability to keep fighting, even when everything seems lost.
These stories are not just about grand achievements, but about resilience in the face of daily adversities. They show us that we don't need to be heroes to find our motivation. Sometimes, it’s enough to take one step at a time, even if the road seems long and tough. As we draw inspiration from these journeys, we are reminded that we too can face our challenges. They encourage us to believe in the impossible, to dream big, and to never give up, no matter how difficult the path may be.
Learning from Failures and Obstacles
Mistakes. They may seem like the end of the world, but in reality, they are just the beginning of something much bigger. Each failure is a hidden opportunity, an invitation to reinvent yourself and grow. Remember that great success stories are built upon a mountain of failures. As Thomas Edison said, "I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work." And he wasn’t alone. Oprah Winfrey was fired from her first job as a TV host, but she used that pain as fuel to become one of the most recognized names in global media.
Instead of sinking into regret, embrace every stumble as a learning opportunity. Failure is not an obstacle; it’s a valuable lesson. As J.K. Rowling wrote, "Failing is the quickest way to learn what not to do." So, you made a mistake? Get up, absorb the lesson, and move forward, stronger than before.
Celebrating Small Victories
Sometimes, we get lost in the pursuit of big achievements and forget to celebrate the small steps that lead us to them. But it is in the details, in the small victories of everyday life, that the greatest impulses to keep going reside. Every action, no matter how simple it may seem, is proof of your courage and resilience. Psychologist Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi (1934 - 2021), in his book Flow: The Psychology of Optimal Experience, speaks about the importance of focusing on small accomplishments. He states, "True happiness comes from constant progress and victories, no matter how small they may be."
Every goal reached, and every challenge overcome is a seed planted in the fertile soil of your motivation. Do not underestimate these moments. It is them, when combined, that build the path toward your greatest achievements. Life is not just made of grand milestones, but of small steps that often make all the difference.
Your strength is within you
You may not see it, but there is a strength inside of you capable of moving mountains. In the toughest moments, it is your foundation, your cornerstone. When everything around you seems to be falling apart, remember: that greatness comes from within. Trust in this invisible power and know that it is guiding you, even when you don't realize it. The best part? It never leaves; it's always with you.
Motivation doesn’t only arise in moments of joy, but in overcoming adversity. Sometimes, it’s in the strength to keep going, even without knowing exactly what lies ahead. Remember that, no matter how dark the path may seem, the simple act of moving forward is already a victory. Motivation is in your heart, waiting to be triggered. Find it within you.
If you're feeling the weight of life, don’t hesitate to share these words. Leave your comments below and share them with someone who also needs to hear this. Sometimes, a small gesture can be the missing piece for someone to find the strength to move forward. Together, we are stronger.
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That’s All Folks,
Fernando Nunes - mentesevolucao@gmail.com