Live in the Present: Build an Inspiring Future!
Reflections on Self-Help and the Power of Change in Your Life
São Leopoldo, October 3, 2024 - Edition 043 - Fer’s Newsletter
Here I am, lying down, looking out the window. The trees sway gently, the birds’ songs echo, while the distant sound of a train blends with everything. At this moment, I realize I’m spending the most precious thing we have: time. You might think I’m wasting it, but I prefer to believe I’m investing it.
It may not sound obvious, but I know. But when I write analogically, with pen and paper, that’s how it works: a handcrafted process, where ideas flow without filters and sometimes without much sense. If you’re new here, you’ve got an excuse. But if you’re part of the "old guard," you should be used to this free flow of thoughts by now.
Writing is my escape, what soothes my mind and organizes my thoughts. While some meditate, I write, disconnectedly. Sometimes it works. And when it does, a text emerges that many identify with, while others don’t even make it past the subtitle.
Yesterday, Wednesday (02), I had a session with my psychologist that left me with two questions that have been occupying my mind ever since. First: she asked me to promise that, until our next session, I wouldn’t compare myself to anyone or anything, only to myself—to my progress. Having worked with me for almost two years, she has noticed numerous changes in me.
Depression, among other things, makes you constantly doubt your abilities. It lowers your self-esteem to the point where it’s almost nonexistent. It’s a daily struggle, where even the smallest mistake can make you feel like you're backtracking. But we keep going, as long as we have the strength.
The second question my psychologist asked me was: “What are you doing today for the Fernando of tomorrow?” Since yesterday, that question hasn’t left my mind. I’ve tried to answer it in different ways, but I feel like I haven’t found the right answer yet. Today, I stand by my choices and no longer care about other people’s opinions. That’s a huge evolution, but because I haven’t seen the results yet, I wonder if I’m on the right path. And while I know the rewards will come in the medium and long term, I sometimes doubt.
“What are you doing today for the Fernando of tomorrow?”
The time I thought I had in the past, I now realize I no longer have ahead of me. And that is distressing. Will I go through life without ever getting it right, without ever being able to say, "I made it"? Will I ever look back and see that I helped people through my content? Or has everything I've done so far been in vain?
No, I haven’t always been like this. I used to be very selfish. But ever since I decided to do something different from what I did in the last three decades, I’ve realized that it’s impossible to grow without helping and teaching others. Yes, I used to think I had nothing to teach.
Today, that’s inconceivable to me. I’ve come to understand that life becomes richer when we are willing to share and, above all, to learn. Continuous learning opened a portal in my mind and showed me that evolving is a constant process.
The doubts still exist, but I keep moving forward, adjusting the course, and seeking the best for the Fernando of tomorrow. I want to enjoy, alongside the people I love, the harvest of the seeds I started planting in February 2019.
I hope that this letter, even if differently than you’re used to, has touched you. Yes, I’m feeling vulnerable, but with an open heart to share my thoughts. Thank you very much for being part of our journey at Fer’s Newsletter.
Feel free to respond, leave your opinion, or ask a question. My life is an open book, and it will always be a pleasure to interact. If this message resonates with you, share it with your friends and invite them to be part of our family.
That’s all folks,
Fernando P. Nunes
mentesevolucao@gmail.com
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Amazing writing!